Hello, and welcome. If you’re reading this, congratulations – it was Blue Monday yesterday, and we got through it.
According to psychology experts, Blue Monday is the most depressing day of the year. The weather is cold, the skies are grey and it’s around the time when our new year resolutions are showing early signs of wear and tear. So we get towards the end of January and we’re all feeling a bit gloomy.
How did you feel yesterday?
Part of my reason for writing this piece was because I had a gloomy day. I’m not even sure why. But this time of year can be hard anyway.
I remember an old housemate, who suffered from depression, saying he always found January and February to be the hardest time, because it was so dark, chilly and the weather was terrible.
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So I’m writing this piece to give some tips on overcoming those gloomy days, when you’re at work, or away from your coping methods.
Even if you love your job, being away from home or out of your comfort zone, even for a few minutes, can be a nightmare if you’re faced with a situation which triggers a mental health problem.
For me, I’m prone to the thought process of “why am I feeling like this? Is it because of this, that, the other?” but yesterday, I had a moment where I realized something.
You don’t need to have a reason to feel low. Just like you don’t necessarily need a reason for feeling happy either. Sometimes you wake up in a good mood, sometimes you don’t.
Yesterday the weather was gloomy. It wasn’t raining, just overcast and grey.
At my workplace, we’ve got a long, tinted window which can often make it look a bit darker outside. It was very quiet in store too. Nothing much to get the blood pumping.
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I have to give myself a pep talk during these times. There are a number of ways I encourage myself to keep going. I’ll share them with you:
You won’t be here all day.
At some point today, you will be on the sofa, watching tele in your pjs/joggers. Or whatever clothing you change into when you get home.
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Even if time is going slowly, it won’t go backwards. If there are two hours left of the day, that two hours is only going to decrease.
Keep yourself busy.
That’s not always easy if, like me, you’re in a job where you’re serving the public. If the public aren’t there, your tasks can be very limited.
I clean things to keep myself occupied – we’re meant to anyway, during these times, but I give things an extra once over. Desks, tills, screens, I can’t quite reach the ceiling but I’m sure it wouldn’t mind a touch of TLC every now and again.
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Don’t clock watch.
This can be difficult if you’re doing something where there’s a clock, or the time, in your line of vision. But if you can manage it, challenge yourself to not look at the time until after a specific milestone. So, if its 5.50pm, which is often just over an hour until my shift finishes, I’ll challenge myself not to look at the time until it’s gone 6pm and I’m into my final hour.
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If you can find a way to keep yourself busy for ages, you cannot beat the moment of euphoria when you look at the time and realise that far more time has passed then you imagined.
Plan your evening in your head.
What’s on tv tonight? What’s for dinner? What’s in the fridge? Give yourself something to look forward to. Have a hot chocolate and order your favourite takeaway when you get home. Do some bedtime reading. Listen to a podcast.
Go for a toilet break.
In the current situation where you need to wash your hands before and after you do pretty much anything, use this to your advantage.
Take an extra minute or two, have a breather, maybe splash some water on your face. Go outside and take a few breaths of fresh air if you can.
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You see how tennis players will usually ask for their towel between each point, even when you’d imagine it would be physically impossible to sweat enough to need the towel each time? That’s just to give them an extra second or two, to clear their mind.
That extra second can make the world of difference. And an extra minute or two can make a big difference to you as well, whether you’re at work, in a zoom meeting, or whatever you’re doing.
Talk to people.
This one can be mega hard if you just don’t feel like being friendly or having a conversation. But you can take a lot from the way you make other people feel. One of my old therapists encouraged me to ask people questions. People like talking about themselves.
Ask how they are. Ask about their weekend. Ask if they’ve got siblings. Ask what their favourite colour is. You never know what could start a conversation.
Take an interest in your colleagues, or customers. The latter especially, showing a complete stranger that you’re interested in their life can make a huge difference to somebodies’ mood.
You never know if somebody might have had some bad news this morning, or maybe they’re having a bad day too. Building a bond with somebody can improve your mood as well. That increased level of human interaction for the day.
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There are a couple of books I’d recommend, to follow on from the last article.
‘Reasons To Stay Alive’ by Matt Haig, is a great read.
I’ve tried
to write this piece in a similar fashion, it’s quite a laid-back read, with
loads of tips on overcoming mini obstacles each day, with a sprinkle of humour
too. Matt Haig himself also does a lot of work on mental health, is a bestselling author and is worth a follow on social media.
‘How To Come Alive Again’ is by the fantastic Beth McColl, and it's a book which I ordered recently.
I haven’t had the chance to read the whole thing yet but I’ve had a look at a few chapters. It’s laid back, with plenty of advice and lots of different topics covered: lifestyle tips, replacing negative thoughts, even tips for managing your love life during darker times.
Miss McColl also includes plenty of
info about self love and self care. A bit of shouting (with you, rather than at you). A couple of swear words as well, which I think
make it a lot more personal and relatable – not that I actively encourage to swear
in every other sentence, but I mean it feels like a human being is talking
directly to you, rather than a piece of work that has gone through a strict editorial
process. The reason I’m pointing this out is because if you’re depressed and/or
anxious you’re more likely to relate to some writing that feels like the author
is talking to you. Beth is also a naturally funny human being, so if you need a laugh then she's a good person to go to. Also a great person to follow on social media.
And, if you’re a sports fan…. Or even if you’re not, to be fair. Both of Peter Crouch’s recent books (How to be a Footballer and I, Robot). Brilliantly written and hilarious. I struggle with reading because I haven’t got the greatest attention span and I can’t sit still for that long, but I couldn’t put his books down.
That's it for today! Hopefully these tips have been useful. We know that a lot of you are working from home at the moment, and so I've tried to suggest ways of adapting the advice for your living room office, kitchen or wherever you're based during your working day. This time of year is hard, but lighter evenings and warmer days are on the way soon.
As always, feel free to reach out on our socials. See you soon!
Matt
Follow Matt: @Matt_jl_24
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